How To Find Your Inner Compass

I needed to l listen to my inner compass … I was recently asked to prepare a video conferencing training session.  It was on a subject I was passionate about, yet the more I thought about it and the closer the day drew near, I ended up scripting what I wanted to say.  I’d started out totally confident that I knew what I needed to know, but as time moved forward I kept hearing myself whisper what if? What if I forget what I want to say? What if I don’t get my point across and leave my listeners dumbfounded?

I found myself slaving over the potential script for days.  I ended up typing out everything I wanted to say and then proceeded to learn it, parrot fashion.  The big day arrived and as I was rehearsing I realised that my voice just sounded bland.  It wasn’t me.  It wasn’t what I wanted the audience to take away.  Yes, I knew my stuff, but by scripting what I wanted to say, I’d removed my personality from it.

So I threw away the script and just kept a note of the various points I wanted to make.  Before the video training session I could feel the nerves creeping in.  Why?  I know my subject!  It frustrated me that natural instincts were planning on undermining the hours and days I’d put into preparing for my training.

Sense finally arrived

Fortunately, we had a few technical glitches to overcome which were enough to make me see sense.  The technical glitches were an annoyance but they put the rest into perspective.  All of a sudden I was able to step back and review my situation.  I eat and breathe therapy.  Of course I knew what I needed to say.  I’d just become blindsided by trying to say it in a particular way when trying to learn the script I’d imprisoned myself within.  I just needed to let my inner compass do the navigating and have faith in the journey it took me on.  And I felt so much more relieved when I relinquished my control over what words I would be saying at what time….

All I needed to do was to trust that I had everything I needed at that moment in time.  There are always going to be moments of uncertainty. That’s the beauty of life. If everything was so predictable life would become boring.  It’s the little challenges that spring up that can make our day shine, particularly when we manage to overcome them when we thought we couldn’t.  Furthermore, we grow when we are forced out of our comfort zone.  So how can we foster confidence in our ability to rely on our inner compass?

Who are you?

Get to know who you are.  A question I ask my clients is “Who is [your name]”  It’s quite a revealing question and one that most people don’t like answering.  It’s nothing to do with ego or arrogance, yet makes you feel that way sometimes.  Essentially, you know who you are deep down, but sometimes it takes just a bit of digging to find the true you.  We become variations of ourselves by using a number of facades.  A facade for our grandparents, for our parents, our children, our grandchildren, our friends who we’ve grown up with and our colleagues.  We have so many sides.

There’s nothing bad with having different facades. Our facades enable us to accommodate and relate to people from other generations to us and different social backgrounds.  But when you strip away those facades, if you were faced with a question from a divine power of what your top 3 defining characteristics are, what would you say?  When you know the answer it will reveal the foundation that your internal compass spins upon.

What are your passions?

What gets your juices flowing?  Notice what really gets you in the zone.  Make a list of things that fill you with a sense of awe, a sense of all-pervading “yes I love this!” kind of feeling.  What moves you and shapes your behaviour?  It’s these aspects of you that nudge your internal compass in a certain direction.

Without knowing it, I’ve ended up being someone who helps others.  When I was small, a thunderstorm outed the electricity from our house.  My very frail grandmother was babysitting me and my sister.  I was 5 at the time and found the dark quite scary, but my overriding concern was to help grandma down the stairs so that we could find the matches to light the candles.  I never thought much of it except for when my dad reminded me about it years after the event.

Since then I’ve lived and worked in a children’s home for abused children in Germany as part of an unpaid placement for my languages degree.  I worked in an aids and cancer research unit in France and now spend my time volunteering in hospice and running my therapy business.  I thoroughly love helping people and without my conscious awareness, my inner compass has set me upon this path.

So, what threads do you see reoccurring through your life?  What do you do that makes you feel worthwhile?  In essence, what builds your sense of self-esteem?  Whatever it is, that invisible guiding light will be your inner compass nudging you along the way.

Have faith in your ability

There will be challenges in life that rear up out of the blue.  When they look insurmountable and you are having a hard time figuring out how to move forward, take a look at what you’ve achieved already.  Take a moment to review how you’ve navigated previous rough waters.  And then sit with the challenge for a while.  Try not to overthink it.  Rely on your inner compass to help show you the right path.  We are often faced with a multitude of options available to us which can make trusting the right choice a difficult decision.  However, when you give a voice to your inner compass, you’ll instinctively know that there is a choice that aligns with your values.  That gut feeling is what will steer you through to calmer seas.

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Ego or intuition?

When you are faced with a dilemma try and differentiate between the ego-driven choices and the intuitive choices.  Use your understanding of yourself to ensure the choice you make comes from a foundation of love and respect, for yourself and others, rather than an ego-driven choice which may involve perceived personal gain or satisfaction of others which doesn’t align with your values.  Even if you make the wrong decision, you’ll feel it soon enough.  When you live a life of integrity and honesty, your inner compass will start niggling away at your conscience until you re-align your course.

Make the decision that is right for you

When you are faced with a difficult decision, step back from the decision-making process for a while and let it settle.  By providing some mental space around the decision, you’ll be able to feel your inner compass navigating you along the right path.  Ask yourself if the decision you are faced with is being influenced in the interests of others at your expense?  Don’t sabotage your integrity to keep others happy when your morals risk being overturned.

By providing some mental space around the decision, you’ll be able to feel your inner compass navigating you along the right path. Click To Tweet

Value your opinion

Valuing your opinion doesn’t mean you become overly opinionated. Rather it means your voice is given worth.  For many of us it’s easy to keep quiet and not express our opinions when they risk going against the grain.  However, when we silence our voice, we disempower ourselves and very often find ourselves on a path that doesn’t suit us.  Have the courage to speak up when necessary.  What’s more, you’ll find that people will respect your opinion more than you think and often welcome a definitive answer so that they know where they stand.  Most importantly, you’ll be living your life in alignment with your inner compass.

Have fun being creative

Sometimes we just need to stop being a human doing and become a human being again.  Consider what makes you excited?  What makes you happy?  What makes you feel soulfully good?  Do more of those things!  As adults, if we’re not careful, we lose the spirit of youth.  The spirit of fun seems to be something we think only children do.  If you see a tree and want to climb it, climb it.  See a puddle and want to jump in it?  Jump!  If you feel like giving someone a bear hug of affection, hug them!  So, do things that make you happy.  Unlock your spirit and let it become free again.

Stop worrying about what if

As we get older we become more self-conscious and self-aware.  What if my outfit looks stupid, what if I say the wrong thing, what if they think my hair looks messy?  Practice letting go and see what happens.  If you feel like giving something new a go, try it out.  Have fun, be creative, break free from the social norms of “approved” behaviour.

Trust your inner compass

Ultimately, your inner compass will keep you aligned on the right path for you, but there is a lot you can do to make that journey easier.  Be honest with yourself.  Have fun.  Be creative.  Live a life of integrity.  Create space around choices you find difficult.  Be proud of who you are.  Amplify your voice.  When you trust your inner compass you’ll find opportunities you never thought possible coming your way and what’s more they’ll be opportunities that resonate with you on a soulful level which help you to grow on an individual basis. When you allow yourself to grow the ripples of positivity that radiate from you will touch people that you’ll never even meet.  Most importantly, have faith and enjoy the journey.